The first time I used a computer was in elementary school in 1995. I was so thrilled by the computer because it made things easier and I always looked forward to playing a game of Oregon Trail. A few years later I entered middle school and started noticing the advances in technology. I made it a point to my parents that we should own our very own computer at home. My parents did not ask much about me wanting a computer because I used the best excuse, that it was to help me do my homework. My wish was granted, and I owned my very own computer. I fell in love with my computer and all I wanted to do was be on it. They say love is blind, but God made it possible for the blind to see. These are my confessions about how through technology I was deceived.
Going back to those AOL days when I would get excited to receive an instant message. I had no idea who was on the other side of the screen. I would go inside of these chatrooms with the M4M “CODE” at the end. It stands for MEN4MEN. The only means for a gay man to communicate with another gay man was through the club scene. It was not that easy to just meet another gay person at the store or supermarket. If there happened to be a connection at the store or supermarket, it was because one was obvious or queeny. Forget it, a gay guy will just wait until he finds that drunk masculine man to seduce. Times have changed though because now a gay man could simply go to a search engine, and read some ads. Technology is so cool, you can even catch a gay guy on radar now with pictures and stats. It is even possible to travel through city to city and rack up some hookups for sex. What became so obvious though is that the same people in the same neighborhood eventually end up all hooking up with each other. Men and women most of the time cannot meet eye to eye because Eve fell into temptation by bitting that apple. These are the roots of sin. What does an Adam do because he needs his Eve to survive? He logs onto a website to hopefully find another Adam. A4A
It’s okay to have a Facebook, especially if it connects you with friends or family. What I have found out was that Facebook is total destruction in a gay relationship though. Trust is very important in a relationship, but what I could not get through my head was how my partner had other gay friends on his facebook that he had hooked up with on several occassions, and think that was fine with me. I know that my ex partner and his FB buddies probably had nothing going on at the moment, but out of respect keep him out of our new relationship please! That’s how I felt. The same goes for me, I had some old friends on my account, but why was it so hard for us to just delete our accounts? It was like we needed it. We needed to log on and participate. Our smartphones would be boring without that FB application. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I learned how difficult it was to keep a healthy gay relationship alive. It even started getting bad when my laptop started to crash =(
Recently I had a big problem though, not only with my laptop, but with my smartphone. My life definitely was revolved around technology, and I noticed that not a day or second can go pay without me being a sucker to it. Thanks to technology I could be a writer, a model, or an investigator. I was so excited when I heard about a smartphone because it was cheaper than a computer. My sister had an extra iPhone at home and I felt relieved because I still had a way of connecting to the internet. I discovered something that many will continue to be blind towards because technology will continue to supposedly make life a little more easier.
I put in my e-mail address into this apple phone and I was given an Apple ID. It was second nature to me to put in all my info into a machine, but still people wonder how their identities get stolen. The phone was bad ass, and I noticed a picture appear on the screen with a picture of the whole world greeting me in different languages. This was NEW to me, it will soon be all over the WORLD, and the anti-christ will demand ORDER. There will be no banks, no robberies, no wait times, no kidnappings. They will find a way for parents to give into that stupid chip I hear are being put inside of animals. With a new chip it will be impossible for a child to be missing, our radars will track this child down in a heartbeat. Like you have probably heard before in the BIBLE, they will try to fool us.
Minutes later after I was checking my E-mails, I received an e-mail from the United Stated Postal Service giving me a conformation number for my change of address. I sent my ex partner a text message right after apologizing for not changing my address right away. I thought he did it for me because he got tired of receiving all of my mail at our old apartment. He did not text back, he always thought I was crazy. Especially because my last days there, I was reading a spiritual book. I e-mailed Apple right back and informed them that this was awkward and never seen before. This iPhone outsmarted me with its artificial intelligence. I glanced to my left and looked long and hard at this iPhone. I noticed there was a bitten apple. Then all of the sudden in my head I thought about: The book of Genesis, Eve biting an apple, The 666 mark of the beast, The Hunger Games. Finally I looked down at my nieces backpack and Belle from Beauty and the Beast was looking right at me. Beauty is what took a bite from the apple (Eve) and the Beast will try to charm you, and feel warm and safe.
I was always blind and faith just was not enough. Like many of us, I wanted to see things. I wanted information. Well the times has come, and I have more than enough information. I actually have too much information. I no longer care for a smartphone or technology. These are the beggining stages of my fear, towards a real father who has been chasing me down for years.